What's in His Heart
by summerdaze87
Summary: One night together they both thought the other would forever regret... Through his attempts to find love, and through hers, their broken hearts lead them back to another and a love they never knew they shared. TRORY


"I'm being honest with you now right now and you need to be hon

Disclaimer: I do not own One Tree Hill or Gilmore Girls.

Author's Note: Yes, I have other stories to be righting- please take the fact that I haven't updated them up with the plot bunnies that have gone into hiding and refuse to resurface for the foreseeable future- if you can find them, that is (and, if you do, please tell them I'm looking for them). This is an idea that has been floating around in my head but that I haven't posted because it never seemed to be just right. I'm happy to say that I'm, well, happy with this piece.

Okay, so Tristin is Lucas Scott from One Tree Hill. His name was never Tristin Dugray. He'd chosen to move to Hartford to live with his grandfather, Janlen, at twelve because he couldn't stand seeing Dan, Nathan, and Deb everyday. He is really the Lucas that we know and love from OTH, but puts on the "Tristin" mask in Hartford because it keeps people from asking questions about his family and his life. He started acting out to get Rory's attention but, when he overhears her telling Dean she hates him, decides it's time to go back home. He told his grandfather that he didn't care where people thought he went, as long as they didn't know the truth. So, after the incident with Bowman's dad's safe, Janlen comes up with the idea to tell everyone that he sent Lucas to military school. Lucas returned to Tree Hill and reverted back to his usual self, the Lucas that everyone remembered from before and knew from his visits home.

This story takes place in the current timeline of OTH and just after GG ended, with everything up to now happening, except the scene with Lucas at the airport on the phone asking whoever was on the other end of the line if she wanted to marry him. Instead of going to the airport, Lucas goes to Keith's grave. Enjoy! -Jess

"_I'm being honest with you now right now, and you need to be honest with yourself. What do you want? If Lindsey's the girl your in love with, great. If it's Peyton, great, and if it's Brooke- just, please, stop hiding your heart. I mean it."_

Lucas Scott replayed his best friend's words over and over again in his head as he sat at his uncle Keith's grave, wishing more than anything that Keith could be there now to offer up a word or two of wisdom. The answer, he knew, was in his heart, locked deep down inside where he had hoped to never have to so much as think about it again. Now, it seemed that he would never truly be able to get away from it. From her.

No longer could the memories he'd tried so hard for six years to suppress be held back, and the last words he'd ever spoken to him hit him with all the force of a sucker-punch to the gut.

"_I gotta go. So, I might kiss you goodbye but, uh, your boyfriend's watching. Take care of yourself, Mary." _

Had he imagined the look of sadness that had crossed her beautiful face before she'd flashed him the sweetest of smiles? Probably, since it was no secret that she hated him. She'd probably just been glad to be rid of him, once and for all. No longer would she be unable to get to her locker because he had some other girl pinned against it. She'd never be taunted with the nickname "Mary" again, however well it suited her.

So, even though it had been six years since he'd seen her and he had yet to stop loving her- doubted, in fact, that he ever truly would- he was sure that she had long since forgotten him. And the one night they'd shared together, in some random room in Madeline's house, had been nothing but a mistake to her. While, to him, it had been a precious moment in time when he'd finally been granted his heart's desire- for that one night, those few wonderful hours, Rory Gilmore had been his.

_That was six years ago, Scott. Haven't you moved on yet?_ In all honesty, he hadn't, though he'd tried his hardest. First, he'd set his sights on Peyton. Had he loved her? Of course. He still loved her. But he hadn't been in love with her, not then and not now. He and Peyton would always have a connection because of how alike they were and how much they'd shared over the years, but they just weren't meant to be.

Brooke Davis... At first, he'd seen a selfish, materialistic teenager with a drinking problem, but the more he'd gotten to know her, the more he'd realized that there was more than met the eye with her. She was Brooke, his Cheery, the woman who had always understood him. She was his rock, and he loved her, but he and Brooke hadn't been meant to share a lifetime together like Haley and Nathan.

And, Lindsay, as much as he wanted to believe that he could settle, wasn't it either. He knew exactly what had drawn him to her, what had kept him coming back, what had pushed him forward with her. She wasn't a substitute for Peyton like everyone thought, or even Brooke. The first moment he'd met her, he'd wondered, "Is this what _she _would be like today?" And the idea that just maybe the answer to that question was "yes" had been enough for him to attempt to convince his heart that maybe Lindsay was the one.

In six years, he hadn't moved on, hadn't let go of the one woman that had never been his to hold onto. Was there someone out there, somewhere, for him who would banish her from his mind, from his heart? He didn't know... and he didn't know if he would ever be ready to go looking for her either. He'd tried, with Peyton and Brooke and Lindsay, and come up empty, hurting those he loved in the process and nearly wreaking friendships that meant everything to him.

He knew who he loved, who he would always love, and she wasn't in Tree Hill, North Carolina. He didn't know where she was, probably never would. All he did know was that his heart belonged to her, and it wasn't fair.

It wasn't fair to Peyton because he knew how much she loved him, how sorry she was now that she'd refused his proposal. Or to Brooke, who he knew didn't love him the way they'd both wanted years before and who just wanted him to be happy... and hoped that he'd find whatever that took with Peyton. And not to Lindsay, whose only fault was that she wasn't, could never be, Rory. And it certainly wasn't fair to him to love someone forever who would never love him in return.

But fair or not, if there was one thing that Lucas Eugene Scott had learned, it was that you didn't get to pick who you fell in love with.

It had been a long week. The thought crossed Rory Gilmore's mind as she watched her five year old daughter dance on tip-toe around headstones in the Tree Hill cemetery, and Rory was forced to admit that it had, in fact, been a long six years. Sure, this week had been particularly hard- she'd graduated from Yale, an accomplishment by any means, but she'd done it as a single mother, turned down her boyfriend's proposal of marriage, and now she was wandering around in a cemetery in Tree Hill, North Carolina, to lay flowers on the grave of a man she'd never know. But Keith Scott had been her step-father Luke's best friend growing up, and Luke had asked her to visit his grave when she'd announced she was going to visit Mia.

She watched as Mary danced, a bouquet of daisies clutched in her tiny little hands. It certainly hadn't been easy being a single mom in college, but she'd been lucky. She'd had her mom and Luke, her best friends Paris and Jess, and her grandparents. And she'd had Logan. She knew he loved her, and that he loved Mary, but he wasn't ready to commit, not like that, and they'd both known it. His ego had taken a hit when she'd turned him down, but that was about it. He would still be her friend, and he would still be one of Mary's favorite "uncles". The one person she hadn't had with her was the one person she'd wanted, needed, with her more than anything- Mary's father.

Rory sighed as her gaze traveled over the names on the headstones, looking for Keith's. She hadn't found out she was pregnant until after he had left, and she'd had no idea how to get in touch with him. Nobody would tell her anything and, she was big enough to admit, she'd been too terrified of what he might say or do to look any harder. She'd never told him what he meant to her, how much she loved him. She'd tried not to, to hate him, but he'd charmed her, though she couldn't say when for sure. One day, he'd been the annoying guy she wanted to avoid at all costs... and the next, she'd been hit with the sudden realization that she was in love with him. It had been like someone had hit her over the head with a frying pan, something straight out of an old Tom and Jerry cartoon. She'd never expected it to happen, had never seen it coming. But she'd fallen for him, and then he'd left. He'd disappeared before the sun had risen after their one night together- the night they'd created a beautiful little girl who looked so much like the father she'd never met, and probably never would.

Mary was the light of her life, the most important thing in the world to her. And she reminded her so much of him that it hurt, sometimes, to look at her. She had his blond hair, with a soft wave to it, his blue eyes- eyes that were several shades lighter than Rory's, and his smirk. Looking at her, the only thing she seemed to have gotten from Rory was her nose.

Rory watched as Mary stopped her dancing and came to stand behind a grave. She rested her head on the top of the headstone and looked up at the man kneeling beside it. The tall blond man that, even from the back, reminded Rory so much of him. But it couldn't be him... not after all these years, not here, not like this- so suddenly and out of the blue. Could it?

Lucas felt the hairs on the hairs on the back of his neck rise and looked up to see a little girl leaning on Keith's grave- a little girl who looked so much like Jamie it was amazing... and quite perplexing. "Hey, kiddo, where are your mommy and daddy?" he asked, wondering why the little girl's parents hadn't been paying closer attention.

It was the voice that got her, Rory knew, the voice that told her that it was really him. She was standing behind him now, not so close that he'd bump into her when he turned around, but close enough to touch. "Right in front of her," she said, her voice hoarse with emotion as the gravity of the moment hit her. This was happening, really and truly, after six years. She'd given up hope, reconciled herself to the fact that she would never have a second chance to tell Lucas Scott everything she should have six years ago.

That voice... It couldn't be. Surely it was just a product of his over-active imagination. He'd been thinking about her, daydreaming about her, and now she suddenly materialized behind him? Not likely. But as he turned slowly on his heel and rose to look her in the eye, he knew it was real. There, not five feet away, was Rory Gilmore- his Mary.

She hadn't changed much. Her hair was shorter, and she looked a little older. Her eyes held a sadness that hadn't been there before, and he wondered who had hurt her- who had meant enough to her to cause such pain.

"Mary." The familiar nickname came out in a whoosh of air he'd been holding since the moment he'd heard her voice. The second it was out, he wished he hadn't said it- he knew how much she'd always detested it.

"Rory," she corrected with a smile. A smile? Why was she smiling? Was she actually happy to him? Maybe he'd dozed off next to Keith's grave after all, and he'd wake up any minute and this wouldn't be happening. _Please, let this be real_, he thought as his heart pounded away inside his chest. She raised her arm and pointed behind him and he followed it with his eyes to the little girl. "That's Mary."

His head swiveled back to Rory, shock crystal clear in the depths of his cool blue gaze. That little girl, the one that looked so much like Jamie they could be siblings, was named Mary? She was Rory's daughter and Rory had actually named her Mary? Why? Why on earth would she do that?

And suddenly it dawned on him- he'd been the one to put that sadness there. He'd been the one that had hurt her. He'd seduced her that night, created a child with her, and runaway like a scared little boy.

"Rory, I-" he began, not really knowing how to continue. How could he tell her everything he was feeling when he didn't really know himself? Ten minutes ago, he'd been wishing he could forget her, get over her, because he'd never have a chance with her- had never stood a chance, even back then. And now she was standing in front of him, and his daughter- their daughter, his and Rory's- was behind him...

Rory didn't give him the chance to struggle with his thoughts and words. Instead, she delved right into her own explanation. "When I found out I was pregnant, I was terrified, Lucas. There was only one person the baby's father could possibly be, and that was you. And you'd already been gone almost two months by then. I tried talking to your grandfather, but he wouldn't tell me anything, and I wasn't brave enough to push harder. I didn't think that you'd really want anything to do with either of us- I mean, I was just a conquest. You proved that by sneaking out in the middle of the night. And what would you want with a baby? I knew I was pretty much on my own, but I also knew that I had Mom and my step-dad, Luke, and Paris and all of my other friends who would support my decision, so I wasn't totally alone. Of course, I had to name her Lorelai, to keep with the tradition that Mom started by naming me after herself, but I didn't know what to do for her middle name, not at first. Or really what to call her since Lorelai and Rory, and even Trix, were taken by other Lorelais. I thought of you and Chilton, and realized that the perfect name had been right there all along- Mary. Lorelai Mary Gilmore didn't have the right ring to it, though, so I used Mariah and decided to call her Mary for short."

_She still babbles when she's nervous_, Lucas thought with a smile as he watched her wring her hands around the hem of her shirt- another classic Rory habit he was glad to see she hadn't outgrown since they'd last seen each other. "You weren't a conquest, Rory. You never were," he told her in all honesty. Sure, at first she'd presented a challenge, but she'd quickly become something more, so much more.

Rory hesitantly met his gaze, unsure whether she was more afraid to find the truth of that statement in his eyes, or something that would tell her it was a blatant lie. What she found was sincerity, something she'd rarely seen with Lucas Scott in the time they'd known each other, and her heart broke all over again as she realized what she'd given up by not pushing harder to find him years ago.

"Don't cry, Ror," Lucas whispered, reaching to wipe away the tears she hadn't realized were flowing from her eyes. "I can't stand to see you cry."

Rory shook her head, trying to find the words to tell him how sorry she was. "I wish I could turn back time," she whispered and Lucas pushed a lock of the hair that had fallen from her pony-tail behind the curve of her ear.

"Why, Rory?" he asked, though he didn't expect the words that came out her mouth next.

"So that you'd still be in love with me," she told him, locking her gaze with his. What he saw in her eyes... it stunned him. Love, so much love, reflecting in those pools of blue. For him? After all this time, was it possible that Rory really did love him after all?

He swallowed against the lump of emotion clogging his throat. "And what about you, Rory? Would you have been in love with me then?"

He swore his heart stopped for a moment when she nodded her head. "Then and... and now, Lucas." The last came out on a whisper so low he almost didn't catch it- almost.

With true smile, not the smirk she'd become so familiar with in high school but the smile she'd seen from him only once before- the night they'd made love, Lucas placed a finger under her chin and tilted it up. "You don't need to turn back time for that, Ror." He saw the surprise in her eyes, heard it in the way her breath hitched. "I love you, Rory Gilmore. I have since I was sixteen years old, and no one and nothing has been able to change that in the past six years. Nothing with ever change it," he promised.

With tears running down her cheeks and the same sweet smile she'd given him the day they'd said good-bye, Rory spoke the words he felt like he'd been waiting a lifetime to hear. "I love you, Lucas Scott. Always and forever."

Just as they leaned into kiss, each felt a tug on their pant legs. Looking down, they found a little girl with her father's smile. "What about me?" she asked with a grin, as though she didn't doubt the fact that this man she'd never met would love her, too. "Will you love me forever and always, too, Daddy?"

Rory must have seen the look of shock that crossed his features because she whispered in his ear, "She has a picture of you by her bed. She's known who you were since the moment she saw you at..." she looked down at the headstone and read the name, smiling as she said, "Keith's grave." Suddenly, she was very grateful to Luke for asking her to bring his old friend flowers.

Lucas nodded his understanding, surprised that he was surprised. Given the fact that she'd obviously loved him just as long- or almost as long- as he'd loved her, it made sense that she hadn't kept him a secret from their daughter. He dropped his hand from Rory's face and reached down to pick Mary up, utterly amazed that he'd helped create this wonderful little girl he was holding. "Absolutely, Mary. Absolutely."


End file.
